Saturday, August 14, 2010

Lotto Tickets

I once argued with someone who told me that giving someone some scratch-off lotto tickets as a gift isn't really thoughtful at all. I'd counter that argument with the logic, "hey, I was thinking of you and wouldn't it be awesome if you won a ton of cash"?

Think about it. If that person hits it big thanks to you, well that was pretty damn thoughtful of you.

I am the kind of person who thinks its a great gift if you give me lotto tickets. It's okay if I don't win anything, I know you were being thoughtful.

Beer!

So I bought this beer making kit last May, never got serious with it. I soaked the labels off of about 60 beer bottles last August, and I pretty much chickened out until about a few weeks ago. I brewed up my first batch of beer, and just bottled it a few days ago. Pretty awesome.

I've even come across a label making program. Here's my first attempt at making a label. Pretty funny.

First Rant of 2010

Albeit I've lived in my condo now for 4 years, I'm just coming to terms with how high my condo common charges are. Don't get me wrong, snow removal in the winter is fantastic, they do a good job. Landscapers: terrific. They keep the areas I never walk on (i.e. my neighbors lush lawns) looking mint. My dining room table is bigger than my front "lawn". My back lawn isn't much. Its rocky clay, underneath several pines. When I grill hamburgers its like looking at the surface of Mars.

So, I wanted to feel like I'm getting my money's worth out of my association this summer. Here's what I did:

1. I was the annoying "goggle" guy that swims for an hour while everyone is trying to play chicken and hit each other with swim noodles.
2. I played some serious white guy tennis on the courts. Complete with grunts, and Macenroe tantrums.
3. Called the receptionist for her to look up old records like when my last chimney inspection was, and could she send me a copy.
4. Bugged the maintenance crew to fix my hose spigot, fill a low spot in my driveway, trim branches etc.
5. Walked into the property manager's office unannounced just to shoot the shit when I didn't have an appointment and let him know about some issues I have with the association.

I could go on. I think its working. I think I got my money's worth out of my association this summer.

Onward...

I just found out that the "cast" of Jersey Shore purportedly makes in excess of $30,000 per episode, have their own clothing lines, workout DVD's, and are making royalties off the first season on DVD. It kills me. I spent my whole life doing good in school, working hard, going to college, getting a Master's, and teaching for 8 years. What they make in a day, I probably make in a year working hard. MTV took a chance on a cliche sliver of Americana and rode it all the way to the bank. When I go to work, I make a difference. Yet, I watch my wife enjoy gut-busting laughs as these people try to figure out how to make a two flavor Gelato cone.

Yet, these freakin' Lasagna-heads are making money hand over bronzed fist by having body image issues, degrading women, drinking, fighting, sleeping with random pasta fazools, and otherwise living a life of lazy debauchery. Yet, we Americans eat this type of thing up. We applaud it, TiVo it, talk about it at work, make jokes on facebook. These kids on Jersey Shore are terrible members of society. They're all going to be awful parents, deadbeats, and we're letting our kids watch this garbage.

Freakin' clowns say stuff like, "wanna smoosh"?      YEAH...I WANNA SMOOSH ALL OF YOU INTO A CHEVY COBALT AND DRIVE IT INTO THE DELAWARE RIVER.

End Rant.